Matt.

by whatkatieblogs

Name: Matt
(Beard) Age: 2 years. My ex wanted me to shave it. I could have killed her.
Do you miss your chin? No.
Beard grooming routine: Moroccan oil! My house mate had some, and I thought it was face wash and was like ‘er this is a bit slimey’, but then it did incredible things to my beard! It was so soft and sort of looked a bit, you know, Viking. I suppose I could use it in my hair next time too. Aside from that I think it’s really important to trim the bit around the mouth. You don’t want any overhang onto your lip. That looks dirty. 

I’ll come clean. It’d been a pretty dry couple of days in terms of capturing beard. I don’t know what happened, I simply lost what those vile moustache-hunters call ‘mo-jo’ but what us bearders call bo-jo. I even lingered around the soy snacks in the local independent supermarket and didn’t pluck up the courage. I lost sight of the fact that bearded men are a lovely people and it is a-ok to march right on up to them and demand their picture. After a text message from a friend which read ‘Get back on the beard train pls. THINK OF YOUR FANS’ and a couple of glasses of goon in the park, I knew it was time get back in the game and dragged a friend along to Collingwood’s densest fur-ground.

And so now I bring you wonderful Matt from the People’s Market. Matt is not only a talented dude for being involved with the cool-as-cucumber Wunce Mag, but he is a pedagog amongst beards. Moroccan oil! That shit is priceless. My bearded pal and Matt then really got excited and shared some excellent tips, but the focus had shifted from me so I reigned it back in. Matt, thank you for reminding me how much fun chatting to your kinfolk is, from henceforth you shall be known as People’s Matt of the People’s Market.